Men : Women = Men : Materialistic Possessions??

No, I haven’t started coaching for the SATs. This is a thought that occurred to me recently when I overheard a couple of college mates raving about a particular car (conversations all too commonly heard in Dubai, a vehicle fanatic’s haven). I am referring to the similarity in attitude that the typical male bears when dealing with his sexual counterpart, and the physical effects that give him pleasure.

Looking at it objectively, purely on the basis of observable phenomena, one can quantify this attitude into three factors:

1. Money : Money in the past and in rural areas till today plays a heavy role in deciding whether a woman is even worth matrimonial alliance or not. I’m referring of course, to the long drawn custom of Dowry. Although Dowry is not too much of an issue in the modern areas which we reside in, it doesn’t mean money has lost itself as a factor of this attitude with urbanization. It has in fact, evolved and hence earned connotations, perhaps most apparent through inheritance of fortunes held by prospective life-partners, and the existence of high class and low class prostitution. In the case of materialism, money has an obvious and all-powerful role.


2. Colour : Hey. If I’m going out to pick up a new mobile or a car, the colour is most definitely not going to be a non-issue. What is important to understand at this point is that I am trying to bring about a comparison in the criteria that most men would definitely consider before committing to an article of luxury, or a woman. All men, or for that matter, all women too have a certain image in mind of their ideal mate. By ideal, I certainly don’t mean to imply that the person is not going to budge from that image which he has in mind. But definitely, he or she would accept only that ‘someone’ who has the most desirable of those qualities. And in majority of the cases, colour fairly prepossesses those desired attributes, in most cases, subconciously. And this is not a fact I’ve conjured out of nowhere. I checked those figures (Bless the Internet), and in each case, be it among women or men, white with coloured matches always fell far below 50%. Anyway, in India at least, there is hardly any stress required to spell out this fact, or to prove it. The infamous ‘Fair and Lovely’ says it all…


3. Outward Appearance : Many would club colour under this, but by outward appearance, I mean the looks, so to say. An example being that a dark person can very much be just as beautiful, attractive or sexy as one with a fairer complexion. Take for instance, Naomi Campbell, Halle Berry (Die Another Day’s orange bikini, Catwoman’s oh-so-tight costume) or Denzel Washington. There…now you see it. No matter how much they say, “It’s what’s inside that matters”, hardly anyone would like to go for someone who’s a gem inside but a horror on the outside. There are the occasional exceptions, no doubt. But exceptions are always there aren’t they? It’s what the majority is that is taken into census. Most in fact, even end up compromising on what lies beneath for what’s on the surface. Certainly unwise…but so it is. And materialism, well, even if a Maruti 800 was as capable a car as a BMW, doubtful if anyone would go for it, especially if they had the money to afford a BM. All because of its…? You’re in a position enough to answer that now.

So, is it that the human mind is built to think only in this one track manner, be it when it is dealing with objects or with people? After reading all this, I’m quite sure some would agree. But there are cases in which all three criteria fail to fit. And I believe it is these cases who live lives liberated from the influence of mindless prejudices, influences and traditions. I don’t say I belong among those cases. Nor do I say it’s always a good thing to be them. But it isn’t bad either. So the next time you see a healthy, handsome chap walking with an arm linked to a native of the deepest hellhole, don’t jump to conclusions. Most probably the guy's hopelessly in love, or has been forced into the marriage. Otherwise, either the trotting terror has a diamond studded spoon in her mouth, or she is the Swan Queen masquerading under a mask of the Devil.

And now, upon finishing this post, I am confused on what I meant to imply in the first place. Oh well. Guess this is just one of those posts that is destined to be looked back upon as the fruit of unnecessary thought. :S

In Short...After Long

As assured, here I am. Once again, geared up with a load of things to chew the brains right out of your heads. Nah. Just kidding. Or am I? Hmmm...

The amount of guilt I've been harbouring because of not updating for so long, only I'm aware of. I've become horribly irregular at it (more than evident from the abundance of 'Update!' comments in my previous posts). And now, I'm paying the price of procrastination. The number of significant things that've happened over the past few months are impossible to document in one post. But unbelievably, that is the precise task I am attempting right now.

The End...And Then Some More

Last, I left off just before the dreaded first semester Comprehensives were to begin. For future record, no references to them will ever be made again...or to the academic aspect of the first semester for that matter (Clear, hopefully, how exactly it was?). Anyway, the only memories I have of them are huddling in the chilly mornings before the exams (which was infact everyday for one and a half weeks, since the exams were consecutive) with a few friends in a tiny corner of Knowledge Village attempting frantic last minute look-throughs (of an unsettling number of articles for the first time ever). Then would come the exam itself, with an intimidating timer flashing the minutes going by on a projector screen in the exam hall.

The Compres met with an unexpected end when the Vice President and Prime Minister of the UAE and Ruler of Dubai, Sheikh Maktoum Bin Rashid Al Maktoum (Poof! That's a long name...) passed away, literally wreaking havoc in the lives of BITSians. It happened a day before the last exam. After a night of speculation, of whether to study for the following day's exam or not (which ultimately everyone ended up not doing), it was annouced that the last exam (i.e. Physics - I) would take place a day after our return from India...that is, after a period of one whole month! I couldn't quite part-take as much as others in the celebratorious after-effects accompanying this piece of news (just to clarify...the postponement of the exam and not the unfortunate death of one of the most prominent personalities of the Middle-East). Though I didn't quite feel so bad about this...the reason being that I was off to India that very evening! Now, to that, one may say, 'Big shit! He's been to India twice already in this semester. Hardly any need to get so excited about this time..'. Well, it’s only after this excessive, but each time brief, exposure to my homeland that I realised that the true intensity of the amount one misses something comes to the surface only when exposed to that thing intermittently and each time, briefly.

I spent the first seven days of this twenty five day holiday in Delhi, savouring the old life. The remaining portion of the vacation was taken up by a trip that we took to the South East of Asia along with my grand parents.

Asian Exploration

We landed in Kuala Lumpur (KL), Malaysia. From here we drove straight to a loftier area known as Genting. Genting was on the whole rather uneventful, disappointing and frankly, a complete waste of time. The much hyped Genting Theme Park were so sad that our own 'Dilli ka Appu Ghar' seemed a better bet. So thankfully enough, we all gladly proceeded to the hub, KL City itself. There, we put up in the luxurious 7-Star Berjaya Times Square Hotel. The first sixteen floors of this enormous building are actually a mall. It even includes an IMAX Theatre! On the second last evening, we all went to see ‘Memoirs of a Geisha' there. The biggest and perhaps funniest letdown was when at the beginning of the show, three sentences gaped at us from the huge screen proclaiming that the following presentation was not in IMAX format! More later on the film itself.

The first day was taken up by a City Tour, which was again a waste, not because the city itself was boring, but because the tour guide was unable to handle the whole affair artfully. The second day mainly consisted of shopping and bickering, two of my least favourite activities. It was on our last day there that we actually stepped out on our own into the heart of the city and saw some of the ever bustling roads and underground Chinese markets KL is oh-so-famous for. One thing worth remark is the openness of piracy in Malaysia. There were shops selling pirated goods even in the Berjaya Hotel Mall! And we thought India’s puny Palika Bazaar is the limit…

From Malaysia we went on to Singapore, but only for a day. The afternoon we landed, we checked into The Meridien. After letting off steam at the hotel for a bit, we went for the famed Night Safari, which was not quite the experience I had hoped and expected it to be. Since we had my grandparents with us, it was quite impossible for us to do anything there (that is, walk down the labyrinthine trails leading into the heart of the reserved forest) other than the Guided Tram Tour. But nonetheless, the stunning environment they've managed to create in that confined area was definitely worth the time we spent there.

The next day, we risked a City Tour once again, but this time, thankfully, it was quite interesting. Not that the lukewarm jokes of the tour guide were overly entertaining, but proved atleast to be less of a bore than the droning monologue of the guide in KL. At the end of the tour, we proceeded to the main and most exciting part of the trip, the Star Cruise, aboard the enormous Super Star Libra. This palatial voyager ship had enough things packed inside it to assure not a moment of boredom while on board. With restaurants, bars, activities, sports, stage shows and countless other distractions, the cruise was in itself a perfect retreat. Not to forget sprawling ocean to gaze into while the powerful wind of the midsea threatens to blow you away towards the amaranthine, unending horizon.

The cruise had two stops excluding its embarkation and disembarkation points (both of them being Singapore). The first stop took us back to Malaysia, but this time to a small port called Penang. This was in fact one of the areas worst affected by the Tsunami. However, our trip to this place mainly consisted of a drive around the city, a visit to a Thai Buddhist Temple and ending up at a fairly empty beachside where I tried out Jetskiing (Not as easy as it looks, is all I have to say about it).

The second stop was Phuket, Thailand (I do not like saying that name out loud...). We definitely managed to see the place quite thoroughly for the few hours that we were there. But all throughout we were looking out for the infamous imitation stuff that the south east is well known for, only to realise that all the shops keeping this stuff were packed near the port where we had disembarked...One of those moments when the urge to reverse time is at its peak.

And so, the cruise came to an end after three days on board. The remaining three days of the trip were in Singapore. Merlion, Sentosa, Serengoon Street. Pleasant.


And so once again, all too soon, it was time to return to the harder things in life. Tests, quizzes, grades, attendance, hostel, warden, boredom, washing your own clothes, pressing your own clothes, folding your own clothes...umm..well...you get the point.

Semester II - An Emotional Rollercoaster

I know the subhead seems a bit overdramatized. But to me it's really an understatement. Really. Won't go much into it, but if the first sem was getting to know the place and making new friends, semester II mainly involved maintaining those friends and surviving in the now mundane, overfamiliar locations...Knowledge Village and the hostel. While it took close to five months to form a strong group of close friends (Arjun, Aatish, Swathi and Sunanda), it didnt take too long for the phrase 'familiarity breeds contempt' to show itself physically. Swathi and I actually saw the storm from its brewing stages. But I can say that each and every person who knew us even faintly could feel its reveberations when it actually unleashed itself upon us.

But two good things definitely came out of it. It overhauled my personality to quite an extent. For the better. It made me less naive and showed me the absolute necessity to tread with caution. Alongside, I've learnt to handle extreme situations with aplomb. And secondly, Swathi and I found not only company, but a meaningful friendship in each other, the most fundamental basis of which is empathy and understanding. I know you're screaming in embarassment right now Swathi, but that's how it is. And you know it. Thanks for being the biggest support anyone can be and for doing the one thing I expect unconditionally from a friend...Reciprocate.

There are two more things worth remark that happened in the second semester.

The Desert Safari
The first is an annual Desert Safari that Knowledge Village organises, which the five of us decided to go for this time. Though it didn't involve all the things present on a normal safari (read BELLYDANCING), it did have a number of other things, all of which we all felt were well worth the fifty dirhams we paid for it. They included dunebashing, which was in fact a ride in a 4x4 helmed by a fit and fine fellow pretending to be all drunk and crazed, camel back rides, sand-boarding and dancing. Oh the dancing! Plus we managed to click some truly classic shots on the outing. Overall, quite the experience!

A Welcome Visit

It was around the mid-sem that my parents and brother came a-visiting. I stayed for over a week with them in a hotel in Bur Dubai and experienced life as a day scholar. An experience indeed. My parents through this visit also got an opportunity to meet the people who meant most to me out in Dubai, through an afternoon out with them.

And now that the First Year has come to a close, I'm back once again in Delhi, this time for a whole three months! Lots to come about what all's been brewing since my arrival. Till then, keep checking back!